


The Wounds On My Heart (Are Only Mended By You)

by chasethewind



Series: What's Your Fantasy? [15]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Comfort Sex, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-24
Updated: 2015-01-24
Packaged: 2018-03-08 21:23:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3223937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chasethewind/pseuds/chasethewind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Don't go." His voice was thick with emotions making it hard to hear, but she understood. Oliver tugged her down until they were laying side by side then wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing into her body until his head came to rest beneath her chin.</p><p>For several moments Felicity sat still, her breaths shallow, her body trembling slightly. It had been months since Oliver had touched her like this. She missed it more than she ever thought possible: his arms around her waist, his head burrowed in the crook of her neck, his nose nuzzling her skin as he inhaled the warm lavender scent of her shampoo. It wasn't until he buried his fingers in the long, golden strands of her hair that she finally relaxed into him.</p><p>She couldn't help herself. Felicity missed him, and now that Oliver was in her arms again, she was reluctant to let go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Wounds On My Heart (Are Only Mended By You)

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Comfort sex
> 
> Set after 2x20.
> 
> AN: I've gotten to the point where I don't care what people think anymore. If you have a problem with the way this series is written, keep your opinions to yourself because I'm not about to listen to people bitch and moan. Just be happy I decided to share this last completely written fic in the series because I have no idea when I'll ever get back to it.

He woke up on something soft. A couch, a mattress, he couldn't tell what, but there was cushioning under his back and someone had been kind enough to place a pillow beneath his injured knee. The warm swipe of a washcloth over his forehead forced him to open his eyes. A gentle smile greeted him as he gazed up, her silhouette illuminated by a single lamp behind her head. "Hi," she whispered, her fingers continuing to do their work, wiping away dried blood until the still sensitive wound along his hairline was exposed.

"Felicity," he breathed, his hand coming up to cup her face. "Where am I?" Oliver then asked, his voice rough from disuse. He tried to glance around his surroundings, but they were cloaked by darkness.

"My place," she replied. "With Roy taking up the table in the Foundry, Dig and I thought it would be better to just bring you here to take care of you." Her hands were soft, gentle, as she pressed the washcloth against his temple. Oliver winced, the pain becoming overwhelming. "I'm sorry," Felicity murmured, pulling it away.

"What... what happened?" He didn't need her to answer. The look in her eyes told him everything he needed to know. The last couple of hours hadn't been one of his random nightmares. They had been all too real, which meant his mother was gone and his sister was probably in more pain than he could possibly imagine.

"I'm sorry, Oliver..." Felicity's voice cracked as she grabbed a tissue from somewhere off to her left and dabbed it under her red-rimmed blue eyes. He shook his head, silently asking her not to say anymore, that he already knew. As much as he didn't want to relive that moment, it came flooding back in stunning detail.

Slade standing before him, his mother and his sister on their knees in front of the crazed mad man as he held out a sword, swinging it between the two women. He forced Oliver to make a choice, one he couldn't,  _wouldn't_ make, one that his mother made for him before she sacrificed herself for her children. "One more person has to die…" Slade's words were on repeat in his mind.

Closing his eyes again, Oliver took a deep breath, releasing it slowly to try and quell the sudden influx of emotions. The pain, the fear, the guilt; they consumed him for several moments until her hand, her tiny, delicate hand, came to rest against his cheek, stroking away the tears he hadn't realized were falling. He gazed up to find her crying as well.

Even though his mother had done a number on her a few months back, the amount of sympathy and compassion Felicity Smoak possessed was beyond fathomable. He reached up, his thumb passing beneath her eye where her tears had ruined her makeup and wiping away the moisture that gathered there. For several moments, they simply stared at each other, brushing back errant tears that continued to fall in the wake of this unspeakable tragedy.

"I'm sorry," Felicity whispered again, breaking the silence that began to feel too heavy. She needed to move, to pull herself away, to regroup. "I should..." As she stood, she threw the washcloth into a bowl of water, but Oliver grabbed her wrist and pulled her back to where she'd been sitting at his side.

"Don't go." His voice was thick with emotions making it hard to hear, but she understood. Oliver tugged her down until they were laying side by side then wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing into her body until his head came to rest beneath her chin.

For several moments Felicity sat still, her breaths shallow, her body trembling slightly. It had been months since Oliver had touched her like this. She missed it more than she ever thought possible: his arms around her waist, his head burrowed in the crook of her neck, his nose nuzzling her skin as he inhaled the warm lavender scent of her shampoo. It wasn't until he buried his fingers in the long, golden strands of her hair that she finally relaxed into him.

She couldn't help herself. Felicity missed him, and now that Oliver was in her arms again, she was reluctant to let go. His transgressions and the pain he'd put her through were nothing compared to this, and for the first time, she truly understood what it meant to forgive someone. The past was in the past and all that mattered now was that Slade hadn't killed him. They could talk about everything else later. Right now, he needed her to be the rock she'd always been.

"Rest," Felicity whispered against his ear as her fingers ran through the short strands of his hair.

He let out a shuddering breath, his eyes blinking closed for a moment as she pressed soft kisses to his forehead. "I can't," Oliver brokenly replied, pulling away to look at her.

Even where she lay beside him, her head tilted slightly. "Why?" she asked.

Those soft, blue eyes had always been Oliver's beacon home, even now as he stared into them for the first time it what felt like ages. When was the last time they spent more than a few minutes together? It had to have been before Sara's official return to Starling City. He'd come to miss those moments more than he cared to admit.

Being with Sara had been a mistake, just as much as sleeping with Isabel had. All he'd wanted to do was keep Felicity safe, but seeing all the pieces of Slade's plan fall into place only made him want to push her farther away. Yet she stayed, holding him close, making sure he was taken care of. This woman was willing to risk her life for him, and what had he done to her? Ripped her heart out and threw it right back at her. He didn't deserve her, didn't deserve all that she was offering. But he didn't want to let her go; he  _couldn't_.

"Because I'm scared," Oliver finally admitted what had been weighing on his mind ever since Slade killed his mother right in front of him.

"Scared of what?" Felicity prodded, still gently stroking her fingers along the planes of his face.

Her voice was so soft and so comforting, he couldn't stop himself from answering even if he tried. "I can't lose you."

Felicity smiled that warm, captivating smile that made his breath catch in his throat. "You're not going to lose me," she whispered. "Just like I'm not going to lose you. We're going to figure this out. I know we will. We always do."

For just a moment, Oliver let himself believe she was telling the truth. He let her words wash over him, let them sink into his soul, but only for a moment. Just like he told himself the kiss he leaned in to give her would only last for a moment. He should have known it would lead to his undoing.

Her lips were as soft as he remembered them, so warm and kissable. Her fingers running through his hair sent jolts of heat and desire coursing through his veins. But nothing compared to the tiny moan that escaped her throat when she leaned just a little closer and deepened the kiss. That was all it took for him to throw caution to the wind and sink his fingers into the long strands of her golden hair, tilting her head back so he could kiss her the way he'd always kissed her: slow and deep.

"I've missed you," Oliver whispered once their lips parted to suck in deep breaths of air. He was glad that Sara had called it off earlier that night. They hadn't really been intimate in a while, and he had a sneaking suspicion she knew he was pining for someone else, just like he knew she was as well. Sara's heart belonged to Nyssa while his belonged to the woman laying beside him now.

Felicity couldn't deny hearing him say those words made her heart flutter in her chest. Or that the look in his eyes when he stared at her sent a pang of want and desire through her body. It had been too long since they'd spent any quality time together. Helping her move into her new townhouse really didn't count since Sky was there snarking up a storm at him. Tonight, though, with all that had happened in the past twenty-four hours, there was no denying her feelings, especially since she knew he needed her now more than ever.

"Not as much as I've missed you," Felicity whispered back, her forehead pressing up against his as she stared at him through the skewed lenses of her glasses. The soft smile remained on her lips as she stroked her fingers through his hair again. They trailed down his neck and coasted over his spine, brushing across the scars that littered his back.

"Where's my shirt?" he asked, feeling the warmth of her palm fall just above the waistband of his pants.

"There was… It was dirty so I took it off you," she said. "I didn't want you ruining my sheets with it."

Oliver took a moment to glance around his surroundings. Now that his eyes had a little more time to adjust, he realized he was laying on Felicity's bed, her soft purple comforter tangled at his feet. "I'm in your room," he noted before his gaze settled back on her.

"Well, it was either this or my couch, and I know for a fact that you would not have fit on that thing, especially with your bum knee," Felicity replied. "I just wanted to make sure you were comfortable. Are you? Because I can crack open a window or grab another blanket if need be."

He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. There was a hint of sadness hidden beneath it. His hand came to rest against her cheek, thumb brushing along her jaw. "This is fine," Oliver finally said.

"Okay, good." Felicity nodded her head. "Then why don't you get some sleep? You've been through so much these past couple of days. You need to rest, alright Oliver?"

He frowned and burrowed his face back into the crook of her neck. "I can't," he barely whispered.

"At least tell me why," she begged, her hands cupping his face as she held it a few inches away from hers. Downcast eyes told her the answer to this question was tearing him up inside. "Please, Oliver. I want to help you. Don't shut me out."

A tear rolled down his cheek and Felicity caught it with her thumb. What felt like a vise clamped around her heart, squeezing it so hard it nearly seized in her chest. She'd seen him broken so many times before, but this time it looked like his entire world had been completely shattered. Those normally stoic azure eyes filled with emotions she'd only seen once before: when he told her and Diggle that the five years he spent on that island were nothing but hell.

"Because… I keep seeing it happen… Over and over… When I close my eyes," Oliver brokenly answered.

Felicity pulled him close, tucking his head beneath her chin as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. They trembled as he cried for the first time she'd seen since the night of the Undertaking. "It's okay. You're safe with me. Let it out. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere," she murmured into his ear, rocking him gently as she pressed soft kisses to his forehead and temple.

The minutes slowly ticked away until his silent sobs turned into sniffles. For a moment Felicity thought he'd finally fallen asleep, but when she tried to untangle herself from his arms, he tightened them around her.

"Please stay," Oliver whispered against her throat before he pulled back to gaze at her. The look in his eyes reeled her in instantly. They begged her not to go, pleaded with her to stay by his side through the rest of the night. He needed her not just physically, but emotionally as well. Reaching out for comfort was something Oliver rarely did, and she wasn't about to deny him.

"Okay," Felicity whispered back as she settled into his side. Before throwing the blanket over their bodies, she pressed one more kiss to his lips, something she would come to regret later. It went from sweet and comforting to needy and desperate in a matter of seconds. Her arms wrapped around his neck on their own accord and it became impossible to pull away.

They'd both been without each other for so long that once Oliver deepened the kiss, there was no stopping the snowball effect it created. She rolled him onto his back, her knees straddling either side of his waist as her fingers combed through his hair. He didn't want this to end, no matter how dire the situation was. Felicity brought about the only peace he'd felt since returning from the island.

He whispered her name against her mouth, a gentle sigh that had her kisses trailing down his chin and his neck until she reached the junction of his collarbones. Her tongue darted out then, lapping across his skin in practiced circles. Groaning, Oliver's fingers sank into her hair. "Felicity," he whispered again.

This time she gazed up at him, those gorgeous blue eyes sparkling in the pale light of her lamp. "Just relax," she murmured. "Let me take care of you tonight." Her lips soon returned to his, and she kissed him again. Oliver held onto her for several long moments, desperate to feel the caress of her tongue along the inside of his mouth for just a little while longer.

It wasn't just desperation that fueled him; it was also need. He  _needed_ to feel her against him. He  _needed_ to know she was there with him, keeping him grounded when all he wanted to do was run. He  _needed_ her to keep his mind off the mess he'd made of his life, the mess that always seemed to follow him wherever he went. Most of all, he just needed  _her_ , because she was his light in the darkness. Everything felt better when he was with her.

Right now, though, her mouth was slowly making its way down his neck again, pressing soft kisses against his flesh as his head rolled back and he gave into her completely. Felicity had free reign to do as she pleased, and she took advantage of it. Her kisses traveled along his broad chest until she reached the waistband of his pants. Slowly, she sat up, her ass resting against his thighs as she gazed down at him.

Grabbing the hem of her white tank top, Felicity pulled it over her head leaving her naked from the waist up. She took Oliver's hands and placed them over her breasts before leaning down to capture his lips once more. This kiss wasn't hurried. It was slow and meandering as he kneaded the mounds beneath his fingers ever so gently in time with her mouth.

With a soft sigh, she pulled away once more. Her hands fell to the waistband of his pants, undoing the belt buckle then the button then the zipper. It wasn't long before she pulled them off his waist and down his legs, discarding them on the floor beside the bed. That left Oliver in a simple pair of black briefs which she hooked her fingers into. They, too, were slowly peeled off until he was completely naked beneath her.

Felicity took her time kissing her way back up his body, her lips paying special attention to each scar or scrape or bruise she found along the way. His body was littered with them from the impact with the other car that had knocked him unconscious before waking up to the horrifying scene that would occupy his mind even now as his partner, his lover, his best friend did her best to relieve him of the weight of his actions.

Reaching out, Oliver's hands cupped her face, bringing it down to his lips as he kissed her in desperation. The thoughts running through his mind needed to stop, and the only way he could achieve that was like this. Felicity's soft lips moving in time with his allowed him the respite he sought. They pushed the pain to the fringes of his consciousness, letting him enjoy the simple pleasures this woman gave him.

The shift in her weight above him made Oliver pause for a moment. When he pulled back, he could see her fingers slipping into the waistband of her pajama pants, pulling them down to reveal nothing but bare skin beneath. They were left to fall to the floor beside the bed before Felicity leaned over him again, capturing his lips for another languid kiss.

Oliver relished in the feel of her mouth against his. He savored it with abandon, refusing to let her go even as she tried to pull back for air. "It's okay," she whispered against his lips. "I'm not leaving. I'm right here." Her fingers brushed through his hair again, ghosting along his temples as her lips pressed soft kisses to his forehead, his cheeks, his jaw. "I've got you." The soft spoken reassurances allowed him to relax a little as Felicity's mouth traveled down his chest again until she reached his lower abdomen.

She took him in her hands as her throat worked convulsively when she bent forward. The need to taste him, to calm him drove her on. Her tongue slowly circled and licked at the broad head of his cock for a couple of minutes before she began to work her way down the shaft. Felicity looked up and noted that he was biting his lower lip, holding back slightly. That was not what she wanted. She needed Oliver to throw caution to the wind, to give in, to clear his mind of the pain for just a little while.

Her eyes challenged him to do so as she opened her mouth and swallowed him halfway to the base. Felicity suckled slowly up his length until only the head remained in her mouth. Then she opened it so that he could watch as she ran her tongue about the helmet once more, before she began the whole process all over again, taking even more of his cock down her throat.

Her efforts were rewarded when a silent tremor rocked Oliver's body. He sighed in contentment, his fingers tangling in her hair, pulling strands free from rubber band that held it up as his hips rocked in time with her mouth. Up and down she went, her lips and tongue working in tandem to grant him all the pleasure in the world.

All Felicity wanted to do was comfort him, put him at ease, take away the pain that remained hidden in his eyes. She did everything she could, used every trick she knew in order to get Oliver to forget for just a few minutes, but the pain remained in those darkened azure pools, dimmed but not gone.

Heart aching, Felicity finished her ministrations with one last kiss upon the head of his cock before sitting up. She crawled across his body, her lips blazing a trail from his navel back to his mouth before reclaiming it. Gentle arms wrapped around his neck, holding Oliver close as her tongue explored his mouth.

"Felicity," he whispered when she pulled back, his eyes locked on hers as his hands came up to frame her face, to hold it close as they stared at each other for several long moments.

Desperation, longing, need and something more captivated her. Felicity leaned down again, her lips pressed to his, eyes fluttering shut for fear of putting a name to the emotion she was scared to admit to herself. Oliver kissed back with an intensity she hadn't felt in ages. His lips consume her, and before long, she found herself rocking against him.

" _Please_ ," he murmured against her mouth.

Oliver watched as her eyes drifted open, staring down at him with that gentle look he hadn't seen since before he'd wronged Felicity in his office. He wanted to capture her mouth again, to turn her over and press her into the mattress like in all the fantasies he'd had after they stopped sleeping together, but his body was too sore and needed to recover.

So when she wiggled a hand from beneath his neck, tracing it down his side until she was at his hip, all Oliver did was lie back and let her do as she pleased. Felicity had promised she'd take care of him tonight. Her warm eyes and soft smile reaffirmed that. As her hand wrapped around his cock and slowly guided him to her entrance, he tangled his fingers in her hair, pulling it free from the rubber band that was on the verge of falling out, and kissed her once more.

It was only a matter of moments before she sank down, sheathing him completely in the warm, wet confines of her pussy. So many nights had passed since the last time he'd been inside her. The sensation alone sent a jolt of heat pulsing through his body. Oliver raked his teeth over her bottom lip before sucking it into his mouth then releasing.

Felicity was already panting, her chest pressed to his feeling every sharp breath he took, every inhale and exhale lifting her before bringing her down again. Soon it was the rhythm her hips took, swaying up before sinking down over his cock. As much as she'd missed his kisses, she missed this more. No dildo or vibrator could fill her the way Oliver did.

Her eyes remained locked on his, even as their lips met and parted. She couldn't get enough of those beautiful azure pools staring up at her as if she was the sun breaking through his stormy skies. Calloused hands continued to cradle her face, holding her close as kiss after kiss spilled from his lips in time with the rhythm of their bodies. Slow and steady, they rocked against each other.

Time was all but forgotten as he clung to her, seeking out refuge in her arms. And she held him as she'd held him all those months ago, like the fragile porcelain doll he was, now broken and almost shattered to pieces. Felicity was the only thing keeping him from completely falling apart. Of all the people who'd entered his life after the island, only she had stayed through it all, never leaving his side, never letting him go even after he put her through hell.

She sat up then, her hips rocking faster as her hand fell to his chest, just above his heart, to steady herself. Oliver sat up as well, unable to separate himself from her embrace. His arms wrapped around her waist, head falling beneath her chin as he held her tight. Their bodies continued to sway, hips meeting and parting in a rhythm as old as time itself.

"Felicity," he breathed against her neck, his lips latching on to a spot where her collarbone met her throat showering it with kisses. Her left hand found it's way into his hair as her right fell against the small of his back, pulling her closer as their bodies dipped and swayed in practiced motions.

"Oliver," she whispered back before peppering his forehead with kisses that traveled down his temple and cheek until they met his lips. It became apparent he wasn't the only one in need that night. Her kisses conveyed the desperation she'd kept hidden all those months they'd been apart. Her mouth latched onto his, intent on staying there until they both came.

Taking advantage of her distracted state, Oliver slipped his hand between their bodies seeking out her clit. When he reached the sensitive little nub, Felicity moaned against his lips. Her hips ground harder against his as her nails raked over his scalp and back. His name spilled from her lips in a strangled cry as he pressed harder against it until she was trembling above him.

"Come for me, Felicity.  _Please_ come for me," he begged when she gazed down at him and their eyes locked once more. Oliver had never felt the need to plead with her before, but tonight was different.

He saw the fire blazing in those soft crystalline pools. Stoking it with a few more hard thrusts of his hips as his fingers pressed against her clit, Oliver watched her fly apart. She shuddered before hoarsely whispering his name and grabbing a fistful of his hair while her other hand raked down his back.

Her thighs quivered as the heat that had been building low in her belly finally exploded into a massive fireball that quickly consumed her whole body. Felicity closed her eyes, pressing her forehead to his then capturing his lips in a searing kiss.

It triggered his orgasm, and he came with his arms wrapped tight around her waist and his ear pressed to her chest listening to the rapid beat of her heart. "Felicity," he softly cried as a solitary tear rolled down his cheek. Never in his life had Oliver felt a flood of emotions this strong and overwhelming for anyone. Three little words popped into his head; three words he dared not say but felt so deep they consumed him.  _I love you._  And he did, from the top of his battered soul to the bottom of his shattered heart. He loved her. And it terrified him.

Slade's plan had already succeeded in taking away his family. If he took Felicity as well, Oliver knew his life would be over. He loved her with a depth unparalleled to even Laurel. They'd barely known each other for two years, yet he belonged to her, heart, mind, body, and soul. He'd give his life for her at the drop of a hat.

At that moment, as they sat wrapped up in each other's arms coming down from their high, Oliver knew what he had to do. He needed to distance himself from her and everyone else that he loved. The need to protect her overpowered his need to be with her in the face of whatever Slade's endgame was. Felicity had to be protected at all costs even if it meant breaking her heart once more.

"Rest, Oliver," she then whispered against his ear, knocking him out of his thoughts. Ever so gently, Felicity pushed him down against the mattress until his head hit the pillow then slid off his body until she lay curled up at his side. She threw the blanket that had haphazardly landed on the floor over their bodies before wrapping her arm around his waist and laying her ear over his heart.

Oliver ran his fingers along the soft planes of her face, brushing errant strands of damp hair away from her forehead before pressing a kiss to it. "You too," he whispered back. The comfort of her embrace and the soothing way in which her breaths fell across his chest allowed his eyes to drift closed, but sleep didn't last long.

A nightmare awoke Oliver barely a few hours later, one that involved Slade's sword slicing through Felicity's neck. He startled awake, but by some miracle hadn't awoken the woman sleeping beside him. For several minutes he lay there trying to catch his breath, trying to calm his racing heart. Feeling each soft breath Felicity took puff against his chest allowed him a brief respite from the things going on in his head.

But Oliver knew he had to go. As much as he wanted to stay wrapped up in the safety of her arms, he needed to leave before the rest of Slade's plan fell into place. As carefully as possible, he slipped out of her bed and began to redress. His pants and underwear were easy to locate on the floor, then he spied his jacket hanging off the doorknob to her bathroom. It was quickly snatched up and slung over his bare shoulders until he spotted his shirt.

Blood stains had seeped into the crisp white fabric all along the left side. The image of his mother laying on the cold, hard ground, her once lively eyes growing cold as they stared back at him assaulted his mind. Oliver felt the sudden rush of fear and guilt wash over him as he grabbed the shirt as well, balling it up and stuffing it into his pocket even though it didn't completely fit. He needed to go, leave before Felicity awoke and begged him to stay because he knew his resolve would crumble if she did.

 _"One more person has to die."_  Slade's words echoed in his mind. No, no more people were going to die because of his actions on the island. Oliver silently vowed to stop this, once and for all. If anyone was going to die, it would be him.

Making his way back to her side of the bed, Oliver leaned down. "I'm sorry," he whispered before pressing a kiss to her forehead. What it really meant was: "I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for what happened between us. I'm sorry for breaking your heart and your trust. I'm sorry for everything, especially what I'm about to do." He didn't say those words, though. Instead, he quietly limped out her bedroom and headed to the one place he thought she'd never find him.


End file.
